Hump Day
Also known as Day 21 of my liquid fast. I'm taking some liberties there, because I'm also having some puree of soup and other things that wouldn't technically be part of a juice fast. Whatevs. At this point I just want a boiled potato. That would be heaven. I'm not that hungry – I'm still getting plenty of calories through my juice and stuff, but it's the COLD. I feel like a bucket of ice. I'm just craving deep down for something cooked. Something hot. With a little fresh spice and not even that much oil or fat. Just cooked veggies. Fresh fruit. A nice salad. Heaven.
But I'm going to try to stick with this a little longer, in any case. I was hoping to get to Day 28, but at this point I'm not trying to kill myself or push it too hard. 28 days would be fine, if I could take more time off of work, or if my husband wasn't on my schedule, on a militant cleaning spree. If I could kick back more, and just chill, it would definitely be easier. But this is 2020, and to be honest, I'm lucky I'm doing as well as I am.
So a round of juicing tomorrow for me – perhaps my last, we'll see. And take it from there. I might just take it through the weekend, who knows. It would be nice to have something besides juice for Thanksgiving. It would be really nice to have something cooked – like a sweet potato. Oh man, that would be the shit. I guess I could do that, too. I could start transitioning soon, so that by Thanksgiving Day I'm cooking myself a nice sweet potato, having a nice salad. A tiny plate of food, but food. That would be nice.
But I think sleep/rest is the biggest missing ingredient here, so I'll start with that. To bed early tonight, and try more juice tomorrow. See how I do. At least make it to the weekend. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. I'm not trying to overdo it. I'm trying to heal my body, and it's come leaps and bounds since I first started this 3 weeks ago. Back then, I was feeling it in my kidneys, gallbladder, spleen, my other organs. Everything around my mid section. It wasn't good. Fever, pain, extreme fatigue. You name it. And while I'm tired, detoxing, in a fog, emotionally projectile vomiting, and fantasizing about cooked food (torturing myself with Sopranos Youtube videos focused just on the food), I still have to take a step back and appreciate just how amazing my body is, to come back from that. To heal. I don't crave potato chips now, nor dairy, or meat. I crave vegetables, and fruit. I am grateful to have that reset, and I intend on keeping with it as long as I possibly can. I told God I would do what it takes to heal myself, and I meant it. That doesn't mean I'll be perfect, or do 28+ days of juice fasting if I can't do it in a kind way for myself, but I will not backslide like I did this summer. That, I will NOT do. Because I have to get serious, I have to get real about my health. If I ever want my adrenals, my thyroid, and my internal thermostat to ever work again, I HAVE to take care of myself. I just do. No alcohol, no caffeine, no dairy, no eggs, very little meat, and almost no processed foods. No sugar. That means no eating out, or very little. Again, I won't be perfect, but I'll be committed to my health. And that is something new. I haven't given myself as much of a chance before. This will be it. 2020 wasn't it. Well, it tried to be. 2021 will be it, for real. It has to be.
In the meantime, I pray to God for His guidance, His love, and his support in this cleanse and spiritual reset. I pray for health, and I will do what it takes to get it. Thank you, Jesus. Amen.